You talk about the weather
Sun's out - it's gonna rain
Take a drive - no car
Take walk - let's stay home
And fool around

You talk about religion
Moses - Jezebel
Go to church - go to bed
Godspell - go to Hell

Why can't you talk dirty?
I like it, when you talk dirty

You talk about politics
White House - whore house
Revolution - prostitution
President - Mickey Mouse

You talk about music
Chopin - too square
Heavy metal - too loud
Top twenty - who cares?

Why can't you talk dirty?
I like it, when you talk dirty

Playboy, Mayfair, Penthouse - White House
Filthy naked poses - Moses
Masochism, sadism, lesbianism - communism
Suntan, striptease, can-can - Chopin

You talk about painting
Van Gogh - kiss my, ear
Gaugin - go where?
Van Dyke - she's queer

You talk about Shakespeare
Romeo - or Juliet
Dickens - good idea
Oliver Twist - not quite yet

Why can't you talk dirty?
I like it, when you talk dirty

Playboy, Mayfair, Penthouse - White House
Filthy naked poses - Moses
Masochism, sadism, lesbianism - communism
Suntan, striptease, can-can - Chopin
Talk dirty, talk dirty